I am about to tell you five of the best things
about me.
1. I am giving. I give of myself, my
time, and my money to family, friends, and my students. I do more than anyone
realizes, behind the scenes, without taking credit. I am the kind of woman who
will work a 12 hour day and then come home and make cupcakes for my students
just to show them that I care about them.
2. I am nurturing. I am incredibly
patient, caring, kind, and calm. In situations where other teachers would yell
at a student, I can keep my cool and speak gently. When others are freaking
out, I can remain calm and centered. I am the kind of woman others aspire to
be.
3. I look out for others. Ever since I was a small child, I
have been deeply concerned about the needs of others. I made sure that other children
were included, especially those who were picked on or left out. As an adult, I
continue to stick up for anyone who needs an advocate. I am fiercely protective.
4. I have the gift of mercy. Although I can be
cautious about letting people get close to me, I offer love and acceptance with
no strings attached. Where others find an opportunity to judge, I find an opportunity
to show compassion. I can see the pain
that dwells behind hatred, anger, and sin.
5. I give the best hugs in the entire world.
Confession: I didn’t really make that list. What I actually did was go to five people (my
husband, my co-teacher, my father, my best friend, and my son) and ask them
what it is that they like about me. It was a horrendously difficult thing to
do. I was embarrassed to ask and embarrassed to hear what they had to say. I
had to bite my tongue to keep from denying their words.
You see, if I had to make a list about myself, if would go
something like this:
Fat
Lazy
Self centered
Snarky
Unaccomplished
That’s the self I see. If you talk to most women, I imagine
that many of us think of ourselves with very negative words. That is what I
hear most of the time when I talk to my friends and co-workers – I hear the
negative, the “too busy”, the “not pretty”, the “should have”, the endless
apologies for things that are perfectly human.
It hurts me when I see women of immense value, women with
endless talent, women I admire, who cannot see themselves in the light of who
they are. I want my friends, my coworkers, the women of my church community,
the women in my family – I want them to see what I see and stop talking to and
about themselves in such negative terms.
But…I can’t ask in others what I am not willing to do
myself. So, I decided to start by asking what others see in me. I am going to
try my best to put fat, lazy, self centered, snarky, and
unaccomplished
in the garbage where they belong. I am going to look in the mirror
and see giving,
protective, nurturing, merciful, and affectionate. I am going to accept compliments
with grace. I am going to live like I believe that the people who love me do so
because they see something in me that is beautiful and worthwhile.
If I can do it, so can you. Ask the people who know you what
they see in you. BELIEVE what they tell you. EMBRACE the amazing person you
are. Throw your negative words away and live the truth of who you are.
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