Tuesday, October 21, 2014

The Truth About Who You Are



                                                

I am about to tell you five of the best things about me. 

1. I am giving. I give of myself, my time, and my money to family, friends, and my students. I do more than anyone realizes, behind the scenes, without taking credit. I am the kind of woman who will work a 12 hour day and then come home and make cupcakes for my students just to show them that I care about them. 

2. I am nurturing. I am incredibly patient, caring, kind, and calm. In situations where other teachers would yell at a student, I can keep my cool and speak gently. When others are freaking out, I can remain calm and centered. I am the kind of woman others aspire to be. 

3. I look out for others. Ever since I was a small child, I have been deeply concerned about the needs of others. I made sure that other children were included, especially those who were picked on or left out. As an adult, I continue to stick up for anyone who needs an advocate. I am fiercely protective

4. I have the gift of mercy. Although I can be cautious about letting people get close to me, I offer love and acceptance with no strings attached. Where others find an opportunity to judge, I find an opportunity to show compassion.  I can see the pain that dwells behind hatred, anger, and sin. 

5. I give the best hugs in the entire world. 

Confession: I didn’t really make that list.  What I actually did was go to five people (my husband, my co-teacher, my father, my best friend, and my son) and ask them what it is that they like about me. It was a horrendously difficult thing to do. I was embarrassed to ask and embarrassed to hear what they had to say. I had to bite my tongue to keep from denying their words.  

You see, if I had to make a list about myself, if would go something like this:

Fat

Lazy

Self centered

Snarky

Unaccomplished

That’s the self I see. If you talk to most women, I imagine that many of us think of ourselves with very negative words. That is what I hear most of the time when I talk to my friends and co-workers – I hear the negative, the “too busy”, the “not pretty”, the “should have”, the endless apologies for things that are perfectly human. 

It hurts me when I see women of immense value, women with endless talent, women I admire, who cannot see themselves in the light of who they are. I want my friends, my coworkers, the women of my church community, the women in my family – I want them to see what I see and stop talking to and about themselves in such negative terms.  

But…I can’t ask in others what I am not willing to do myself. So, I decided to start by asking what others see in me. I am going to try my best to put fat, lazy, self centered, snarky, and unaccomplished in the garbage where they belong. I am going to look in the mirror and see giving, protective, nurturing, merciful, and affectionate. I am going to accept compliments with grace. I am going to live like I believe that the people who love me do so because they see something in me that is beautiful and worthwhile. 

If I can do it, so can you. Ask the people who know you what they see in you. BELIEVE what they tell you. EMBRACE the amazing person you are. Throw your negative words away and live the truth of who you are.

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